Monday, August 23, 2010

ACCOMPLISHMENT



–noun
1.
an act or instance of carrying into effect; fulfillment: the accomplishment of our desires.

Desire? Motivation? Goal setting? Anyway you want to look at it, an accomplishment or achievement is something to be proud of. So I stand in front of you today knowing I am proud of what I did, how I did it, and that I achieved my goal. I set my mind to it, I did it, I'm proud.

Taking a step back: 16 weeks ago I thought of how long of a road it was going to be to get through this. Now, its over, the dedication, training, strict diet. Its now over, yet I have to look at it like life has just begun. My new journey into nutrition, performance, levels of dedication, and drive. Not only for my career, but also in life. I didn't do this for me, but for what I can bring to the table for other people, my clients, family and friends. If I can do it, anyone can. I'm just here to show you how.

It took more than trust in people to help. You learn a lot about yourself in the way others move you to pursue your dreams. I've learned how to trust and how to be trusted. I've learned when to say yes, when to say no, and how to listen to my body. Could I have done things differently? Sure...more protein, less cardio, more reps, no eating after nine. Sure. Would that have changed my outlook about this in the long run? No. I don't look in the mirror and ask what i could have done different to win first, I say to myself...Hell Yes, Congrats.

What was the hardest part? The last week. The final countdown. Eating was fine, chicken and asparagus. I ate to live, I didn't live to eat. The hardest part was taking out what we take for granted. Water. 64 oz, 32 oz, 16 oz, 8 oz, sips. That was the drill. Down to the final day. I found myself licking icecubes to quench my thirst only to feel bad about what I was doing and how it was going to affect my physique the next day. Talk about feeling awful.

What was the best part? Standing on stage, being proud of the body god gave me. Realizing that the people I loved the most were all there watching me and proud of me. Listening to their cheers, praise, and voices kept me going while I held my pose. The best part was the lights, cameras, and action. I made this journey my dance, my performance, and my dream. It became my reality.

I don't leave with just that. Its not over...my competitive nature has just begun. 3rd place...I'll take it. Will I do another, you may have to wait and find out. Will it be soon? My Answer: Football season starts in 12 days.

Until then: I cherish the chocolate covered pretzels, chips and salsa, pizza, and frozen yogurt I'm now putting back into my diet. All in moderation that is :)



Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Limits


Its Wednesday night, I'm out of water for the day, chewing gum is now hurting my jaw, and I'm craving a new invention at the state fare of a cheeseburger on a krispy kream donut.





So instead of salivating over what I can't have, I'm going to focus on what I do have. I realized I had to focus on this tonight when tears came to my eyes at the gym and it hurt more to cry than not because my spray tan chemicals were burning my eyeballs. I realized this when I was running last night and had no idea if my feet were even moving one in front of the other. I felt like I was in a scene from inception. I realized this when I got goosebumps from my group of 30 women singing happy birthday to me from the pool in my aquafit class this morning.

Tomorrow I hit the quarter century of my life...25. I can't believe it. What I really can't believe is that I can't have my cake and eat it too. On the agenda tomorrow is a wal-mart run for a vanilla cupcake candle, lip smackers vanilla cake lip gloss, and I may even throw some Vanilla bean hand soap in there too.

I've realized how many things you can do to overcome your cravings. Countless upon countless times I've let myself go into thinking 'one really isn't that bad,' until it really made a difference. When I started training for my figure show, I was the heaviest and most out of shape I've ever been. I let my anxiety about my career and future take over my body. It wasn't until I started living and letting my brain lead me in my new adventure to understand where and what it really means to BE.

By allowing my brain and body finally become one, I realize why I'm here and what I'm meant to do. I'm here to use my body as my engine to inspire others. After an episode in my life at the age of 16 I've been seeking the answer to why I was still walking on my two feet. There is a plan somewhere, I just needed to be patient to attack it. I don't have the all the answers, nor will I ever stop looking for them. But for now, I let my mind and my body stay interlocked as one. By working together to create an engine that is so great and so powerful to educate and touch the lives of many.

I go into my 25th year of my life realizing the past 24 years have lead me to where I am, brought me specifically to the people I've met, and looking forward to the journey I'm about to unfold.

So I raise my...um...well...16 oz of distilled water tomorrow and cheers to the following:

The Month of August
My wonderful and loving family
my truly amazing and inspiring friends
Pictures
weddings
Facebook
Stride Gum
DJ Emerson Day's hip hop mixes
Mrs. Dash
Penn State football season starting in 17 days
Groupon
Starbucks
YOU for reading my blog!

3 days....





Sunday, August 15, 2010

...It's Where the Heart is!


Somehow 16 weeks has turned into 6 days.
6 days until my journey finally becomes a reality. This reality of me stepping on stage is becoming real with every ounce of chicken
and asparagus I consume. :)


Meal 1: 6 egg whites
Meals 2-5: 5 oz chicken 5 oz of Asparagus or broccoli
Distilled Water and supplements.


I look at this week with an attitude and appreciation for
everything around me. Appreciating the moments where I've felt like giving up, only to turn to memories and advice from people who have challenged me mentally and physically. Appreciating the moments where I have seen changes in my physical and mental attributes. Appreciating the engine that God gave me to use to the best of my abilities. The appreciation to transform, engage, love, and hold steady to values and goals. The appreciation for those around me who have been so supportive.


HOME: HAPPY VALLEY:
I laughed this weekend. I laughed a lot. My dad hates the smell, look, taste, everything about green vegetables. I come home and the only thing I'm eating is asparagus and broccoli. I laugh because I can't imagine how much he was cringing inside when he had to smell it not just for one meal, but for 5. Even when we went out to lunch at Chilli's...I order the waitress to heat up my prepared meal for me while my parents order a healthy chicken salad. I couldn't do it without them.


I laugh at my parents supportive sense of humor about my diet, lifestyle, and workouts. I took a step outside of the box this weekend and viewed my life from their eyes...laughed not only because it looks pretty insane, but to see the joy and learn from the insanity. So, I opened up their world of insanity/the newest trend of the vibram 5 finger shoes. My dad now has it down to a science on how to put them on in less than a minute for each shoe. My mom mastered the technique of the the intrinsic movements within her little toe to make the shoe easier to get in. My Parents too, have stepped outside the box of their running shoes into something that separates their style, stability, and uniqueness about their tribute to their own bodies.


This weekend I laughed, learned, and now appreciate more than I ever have the family and friends I have. The support and confidence I have been blessed with from my parents has been something no other two people could have taught me.


I step outside this week: outside my cravings, feelings, emotions toward my goal...put it all together and JUST DO IT.



6 pounds of chicken...check
6 pounds of broccoli...check
6 pounds of asparagus...check
4 dozen eggs....check
4 gallons of distilled water...check.


HEART.SMILE.LIVE.GROW.APPRECIATE.







Wednesday, August 4, 2010

It Appears to be a CupCake


I've been stuck on writing because of how scattered my emotions/feelings/life has been these past few weeks. I have had great success in the physical appearance and attributes of my body (so they say) but is what I see in themirror really what's there? Is what I'm training for really a sport? Sports to me are
1. competitive
2. interactive
3.physically and mentally challenging
4.FUN.
The fun part about the sport of training for a figure show has been seeing the results. Getting there has been the challenging part...which in most parts of this journey have not been fun. Science is fun, or should be fun. Figuring out what works and what doesn't is fun if you come up with a result that wins. When its your own body you are using for your science project, not so much fun. My science project is to win.
What foods make me gain or cut weight? Match that with the question of what cardio and lift program I should follow? Did I do too much, not enough? Throughout the day all I have left is "Must keep going."
There is nothing simple about the bodybuilding world people....trust me.

So I'll separate the fun and not so fun for this post:
Fun:
Dropping weight and jean size. (what girl doesn't want to see that!?)
Not Fun:
Not having hundreds of dollars to buy new jeans because you can fit two legs in one of your old pairs of sevens. :(
Do I now save a 'non competition pile' and 'competition pile' in my closet??
Fun:
Learning how to cook healthy foods- Check out my great friend and food enthusiast; Ms. Kelly Hanson's blog: http://asexypieceofmeat.blogspot.com/
Not fun:
Taking chicken, egg whites, and veggies into Fenway Park.
Fun:
Being able to get through a workout faster than a guy :)
Not Fun:
Morning cardio on an empty stomach.
Fun:
Accomplishing and achieving goals. Physical, mental, work.
Not Fun:
Sacrificing socialization in new city
Fun:
Looking tan without really 'tanning'
Not Fun:
Having your coach ask if you just worked on your car because it looks like you have oil on your neck from the Mystic tan you got the night before.
Fun:
Learning new things about my body and being able to teach my experiences to my clients and others.
Not Fun:
Relying on coffee and caffeine to get through my day and realizing that I can't put down a box of wheat thins or triscuits.

So you ask the question: what is the first thing you're going to do after the competition?
My answer: Learn to have fun again with life without sweating the small stuff. I'll learn to not worry about how much sodium is in my protein shake, if I ate too many banana chips, or did enough burpees to cut enough calories for the day.
What am I looking forward to: only one hour in the gym per day, time with friends, energy for classes, happy hours.

Until then...17 days and counting.

17 days to make this sport as fun as I possibly can by putting a smile on my face, staying focused.

I see the light at the end of the tunnel...and it just so happens to be in the shape of a cupcake.